If you need 144 rolls of toilet paper for a month-long quarantine, you probably should’ve seen a doctor long before COVID-19.
What’s the difference between COVID-19 and Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet? One’s a coronavirus and the other is a Verona crisis.
The World Health Organization has announced that dogs cannot contract COVID-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released. To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.
There’s a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music. It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
Ran out of toilet paper during the COVID-19 pandemic and had use lettuce leaves. Today was just the tip of the iceberg, tomorrow romaines to be seen.
Why stupid COVID-19 jokes? In a few minutes—because I will keep it brief this evening—we will renew our Baptismal Vows. Following the confirmation of the Creed, we are asked five “Will you” questions: “Will you continue… Will you persevere… Will you proclaim… Will you seek and serve… Will you strive…” For the past year, our response has been, “I sure would like to, but… COVID-19.” “I could help with that, but… yeah, COVID-19.” “I’d really like to come to church, but… COVID-19.” It’s a bit like me and The Queen (That’s the cat. Her real name is Rain, but I’m only allowed to call her by her proper title, thus… The Queen.) I’m out shopping and come across something I think would look nice in the house and then I say to myself, “I have a cat”—meaning it’ll last until The Queen decides to knock in on the floor. It’s the answer to so many things, “I have a cat.” The same has been true with COVID-19, it is the answer to everything, including why we haven’t been able to fully live into our Baptismal Vows. So, I want you to keep this in mind—because we’re not quite there yet, but we are very close—I want you to keep in mind that, pretty soon, COVID-19 is only going to be an excuse, not a reason. We’ve been safe and playing by the necessary rules, but now we’re all getting vaccinated and this pandemic will be over, therefore, very soon, it will be time to reinvest ourselves into our faith, and our church, and the fulfillment of our vows.
I am so very thankful for all of you who have come out tonight and have begun to return to church. I am also so very thankful for everyone watching and not watching on the internet, but we are nearing the time when we must once again be the Church in the fullest meaning of that word, so tonight, as many around the world are preparing for and being baptized, let us stand together and recommit ourselves to our own vows, so that when the day arrives, we can, without delay, reconvene the work of God and His Church. (p.292 of the BCP)